I have not been blogging regularly and there is a reason for it.....
My husband and I have been trying to have another child for about 8 months now with no luck. I have a condition called Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS), which basically does not allow me to ovulate each month. Here is a link if you are interested in finding out more about this condition from the Mayo Clinic. There is no cure for PCOS and it is not known why women get it. I have struggled with infertility since trying to conceive Little Bird.
We have spend the past month running around like maniacs. I found out that this cycle, which was our first, did not work. I have been trying to keep it together but as you can imagine it has been hard to do. I have been through so many let downs, tests, ultrasounds, shots, medications that we still don't quite get how this did not happen. I feel so inadequate. I am very angry and upset right now and still trying to wrap my head around it all. I have been trying to come to grips with the fact that it is God's will and not for me to understand at this point. I know that it will come in time and blah, blah, blah, I am tired of hearing that. Normally I am not like this, I am more of a put on your big girl panties, get the hell over it and do what you have to do but I just feel so differently about this. Pity party anyone? It's at my house tonight around 5.....BYOB
Really I have everything in the world to be thankful for. I have a husband who loves me, three beautiful little girls and wonderful group of friends. I cherish everyday with them. God has certainly given me some blessing, I know!
So onward.....I am waiting to find out when we start round 2. I am trying to mentally prepare myself for either scenario. I know that God will guide us but right now it is hard to keep my faith up.
And since no blog is interesting without some pictures.........Here are some people I am thankful for!
Little Bug |
Peanut |
Little Bird |
The Hubs |